Lately

So, lately I have been thinking.... thinking about the things I have done, the changes I have made and the chances I have missed and the things that will happen. I don't know when I became so philosophical - however - perhaps it is something in the highly cholorinated water in Cambridge Bay? LOL. I feel like I may be missing out - I am 32 years old, living in the North with a great set of new friends, no social life, and a kiddo who keeps me in stiches with his crazy ideas and sayings...

i.e."momma, what do my want from the cupboard" OR "momma, what am my going to draw?" OR "momma, what am my are going to do" ---- seriously - do psychic powers come along with motherhood? Should I protest that I am missing out here? I really never know what he wants from the cupboard, I am always wrong on my guesses of what he is going to draw and I never quite prepared that what he is going to do, is probably jump on my head! HAHAHAHAHA!

I feel like I want some things that I have never wanted before. I feel that I really need someone to be with me, to love me, to take care of me, to protect me... any of you reading this who know me in person, know very well that THIS IS NOT ME! I have always believed that I am a strong woman, that I am independant, that I can take care of myself and my son, that I can do anything on my own...

H o W e V e R . . .

this is not how I feel right now! OMG - in Ellyott's words, "My am freaking out a little bit" - this is vulnerable and scary. Probably even more scary then it would be to say I am crushing on someone or more than that.... I don't really knwo what I am talking about right now.... I have been facilitating a training all week, have been sick since the 2nd week in January and Ellyott is sick too. So I am in my delusional, cough medicine, sniffles state - that is probably not the most responsible time to be blogging....

I will write again soon - probably with some crazy comment about how this one makes no sense, that I am not vulnerable and that I do not need someone to take care of me.... blah, blah, blah.... don't listen if that is the case.... truth comes out today!